The Ontario girl whose demand for a code word thwarted an abduction attempt is being hailed as a streetproofing success story, but at least one child safety expert is warning parents there’s no perfect way to ward off child abductions.
Stu Auty, founding president of the Canadian Safe School Network with more than 30 years experience in the field of education, says he’s glad the girl avoided being abducted, but it’s important to remember that code words are not foolproof.
“I really have to provide a cautionary moment here: there’s no simple panacea to this,” Auty told CTV News Channel Thursday.
“In some cases, if there is a password, it could well be that that engages dialogue with the child. And an older adult who can convince a child to engage in a dialogue – that can go the other way.
“But I’m happy to hear that in this case, it worked.”
Durham Regional Police say that on Monday afternoon, a man approached a 10-year-old girl outside her school in Ajax, east of Toronto, and tried to lure her into his vehicle where a woman sat waiting.
The man told the girl her parents had sent him to pick her up. But the girl was skeptical and told the man to repeat a secret code word her parents had taught her. The word was to be used only by someone her parents had actually sent to pick her up.
Police say the stranger took a guess but got it wrong. He then became nervous and left.
When she returned home she told her parents, who notified police. The girl was able to remember a few of the licence plate numbers and offered descriptions of the car and suspects. Police are now searching for the suspects.
Auty says it’s best to tell children that if a stranger tries to talk to them, they should simply run away to find the nearest adult. Children should also be taught that if they feel they’re being watched to find an adult and tell them.
But he says, the best way to avoid such situations is to ensure children always have someone around them they trust.
“Children really shouldn’t be alone. If they are going to and from school, they should be accompanied with other children,” he says.
If they are latchkey kids, they should have a rule that when they get home, they must phone one of their parents at work to check in, Auty says. Older kids who have cellphones should be checking in with their parents when they get home as well.
As for when it’s time to loosen the reins a little, so that children can walk to and from school on their own, Auty says there are no hard and fast rules. Instead, he says it really comes down to when parents feel comfortable.
“Every parent makes their own judgment. You know your child better than anybody. The parent really is the child’s best advocate,” he says.
Here are a few more tips:
- Teach your child to shout, “You’re not my mother!” or “You’re not my father!” if someone tries to take them away
- Teach your child to say “No!” firmly. Practice shouting it with them
- Teach them to go to a sales clerk if they’re separated from you in a store
- Teach them to never invite strangers into the house or answer the door when alone
- As soon as they’re old enough, teach them their address, phone number and parents’ names
- As soon as they are old enough, teach them how to dial 911